Friday, February 05, 2010

Writing Process

I tried to start writing my sermon in my office yesterday afternoon. But my office simply isn't conducive to liturgical writing. So I gave up, finished my work for the day, and went home to try there. Then my writing process looked like this:

Day 1:
Cook dinner
Eat dinner while watching NCIS
Clean up while watching a second episode of NCIS
Write about a page
Get stuck on next idea
Call Dad and spend an hour trying to figure out where the sermon is going. While talking to him, realize that this sermon strongly resembles a smushing together of two sermons I've already preached. Come to conclusion that I only really have three sermons and I riff on those same three themes in every sermon I write. Lament that conclusion aloud while Dad attempts to reassure me. Have a brilliant idea for the sermon. Hang up with Dad.
Try to put brilliant idea on paper and decide that it's not brilliant after all.
Get frustrated.
Have glass of ice water to calm down.
Watch Coach Carter in hopes of giving brain a "rest" that will enable better writing.
Get tired and decide to go to bed and face the sermon in the morning.

Day 2:
Get onto computer to start sermon
Spend half an hour looking at weather sites and determining whether I can travel for my evening plans.
Call sister to discuss driving conditions. Decide to cancel evening plans.
Call partner for evening plans, apologize for canceling. Further lament sermon problems to her.
Re-read page of sermon written yesterday. Hate it.
Decide to re-fuel before attempting re-write. Have breakfast.
While putting breakfast dishes away, remember that there are loads of laundry in the washer and dryer.
Move loads, fold laundry.
Shower and dress.
Sit down to computer to re-write sermon.
Get distracted by facebook and e-mail, spend 30 minutes keeping up with every person I've ever met.
Notice that weather is worsening, decide to get groceries in case I get snowed in
Go to store. Realize I left wallet at home.
Go home. Get wallet. Return to store. Buy groceries.
Put groceries away.
Re-read half-sermon again. Still dislike it, but after 30 minutes of staring at document still can't figure out how to fix it.
Decide that I need to get into writing mode coffee-shop-style.
Go to Starbucks to get coffee.
Relocate laptop to dining room, arrange books and coffee.
Drink coffee while checking e-mail and facebook again.
Write three alternate thesis statements for the sermon.
Decide to return to slightly-altered original thesis.
Move loads of laundry again.
Stare at screen impotently for another fifteen minutes
Decide to read a chapter of the Cloister Walk for inspiration
Instead of getting inspired, I get further discouraged by the comparison between Norris' brilliance and my own inability to write.
Receive phone call from county school system (which seems to think I have a child in school here...?) informing me that all weekend activities are cancelled.
Figure the odds that worship will be cancelled on Sunday. Conclude that it is unlikely and that I must actually write this sermon.
Try "warm-up" writing on blog. End up listing useless activities instead.
After 36 hours, still no sermon.
EPIC FAIL.

This month I start preaching every week instead of once a month. It could be much more challenging than I originally thought...

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

LOVE it!

At least you got your laundry done?

オテモヤン said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
sanctifyingsarah said...

Your days don't sound much different than mine. I waited in the grocery line for 30 minutes then after checker gave me my total I realized I had forgotten my wallet! I have a lot of laundry done too, but I was too cheap to go buy Starbucks so I failed at an attempt to make one at home. Oh, we are so alike.

K. Toole said...

I can't wait to give you a copy of an article I just read by Jana Childers in Worship Arts Magazine about sermon preparation. I could hear you again and again as I read the article.

Paige said...

This might be one of the more entertaining things I've ever read. =P

It's OK. I have a sermon due for Long on Thursday, and I'm in far worse shape . . . I can't even find a scripture passage. =/