Saturday, September 19, 2009

Reflections on a Quarter-Century

I turned twenty-five today. It's a bit strange, because I feel simultaneously very old and very young. A part of me is shocked that I've now crossed the very last threshold of "now you're old enough to do everything," and is amazed that I'm really that old. Another part of me can't believe that, with all the stuff I do every day, and the average age of the people I work with and for, I'm only just now turning 25. It seems as though most other people my age are either a) established, married, and thinking about a family, or b) in school or recently finished and out partying it up every weekend. I am neither of those--a fact which surprises even me.

Ten years ago, I would never have envisioned myself here at this point in my life. In fact, ten years ago, I thought that at 25 I'd be working for a newspaper, probably out west somewhere. I thought I'd be married, living with my spouse in an apartment or first house. I thought I'd have a dog and dishes that weren't from my parents' house in the seventies. Fifteen-year-old me would never have imagined I'd be a pastor or that I'd be single.

On the other hand, I've done some incredible things that I never would have dreamed I could have done. I finished not just my a bachelor's degree, but also a masters. I got to study in South Africa, do mission work in Peru and Brazil, and travel in the Middle East. I've driven halfway across the country by myself, lived in four different states, and flown halfway around the world. I've been with people when they've died, officiated at funerals, presided over communion, and tomorrow I'll baptize someone. I've been blessed with incredible opportunities and wonderful friendships.

My first quarter-century has not been what I expected. But I have loved it. Not every minute, of course, but a lot of it. And I refuse to regret any of it, because I do not have a long enough view to make that kind of judgement. Everything that has happened thus far has made me who I am and brought me to this place in my life. And I like who I am and where I find myself, so I cannot regret the things that brought me here. I have been given opportunities, and I have made choices, and so far I am pleased with the outcomes.

At twenty-five, with probably sixty more years of life ahead of me, I simply hope that at the end of that time I will have the same attitude: thankful for the blessings, and glad to be who and where I am.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

We are happy that you are the person you are.

sanctifyingsarah said...

You can't run for president until you are 35 and you can't join the AARP until you are 55, see there are still milestones to reach for!

Lauren said...

You only THINK I can't join the AARP until I'm 55. I got an invitation to join the AARP when I was 22. (No joke. I'm not sure how I got on their mailing list, but it was hilarious!) Good point about being president, though. That's an important milestone, since I'm totally planning on running.

CCL said...

You will have my vote if running for president is what you feel called to do. I hope you do have sixty more years. Every day is a gift and a blessing. With no guarantees of how many days one will be given, it makes sense to use the days as carefully and fully as you have done and are doing. I can't wait to see what the next twenty-five bring for you!